to the girl in her heels

here's how to do it right.



Today as I sidled into my seat, coming to greet my gourmet cottage cheese and strawberry jam concoction of epic flavorful proportions, I glanced over to the stir-fry chicken line and was instead distracted by the pair of bright blue pants heading my way. But it wasn't my mind telling me that my purchase a few weeks ago of the purple pants were the better buy for me that was causing the commotion in my head. It was this girl's shoes-- rather, how she looked in them.

Neurons fire at 200 meters per second. In just a few milliseconds I was able to think each of these thoughts leading to the next, ultimately leading up to my final thought --which I definitely hope you all read.

1. Nice shoes.
2. Wait.
3. Oh my gosh you look like you are about to slip-- fall over?
4. Oh wait you are about to fall over
5. No you just look like that
6. Should I get up to help you or not???
7. You're gone now
8. Walking in heels is a vital skill. I feel bad for this girl.
9. Nice pants though. Poor shoes.
10. Wait! I will not allow myself to feel bad. In fact I will help her in her heels get glad.
11. I'm really good with alliterations.


Anyway. Simple trick, and it will make your life. Ready??????????????


Sigh now I've built it up. Anyway,

Just lean back! Trust me. Lean back on your heels and the rest of your spine, bosom, butt, BLAH will fall into place. Now go. Don't make me get up to save you at least until I'm done with this cottage cheese. Yum.