have you met life

Current mood: like i've met life

today, i was in my backyard, barefooted, blowing bubbles. I highly recommend that everyone try it. and after you've blown a couple small ones, i dare you to try and concentrate. Concentrate on blowing the biggest motherload of a rainbow of a bubble you've ever seen. Do it. You have to be very steady, very patient. You have to really, really breathe. More than that, you have to concentrate. For about 11 seconds, you will forget everything. Everything but the transparent orb swirling with colors you only see in a puddle of fallen gasoline oil. Keep breathing. Start holding your breath, and then still, there will be nothing but you and the crystal bubble. The fight with your friend? The broken vase? The undone homework? The unpayed taxes? For me, it was the friend that left without saying a word. Whatever it may be, whatever it was, you will forget about it. And the clear water tears in your eyes will be gone and all that will be reflected in them will be the transparent swirls of liquid color, joy, a small sphere of purity and serene. When it pops, i dare you try to make and even bigger motherload of a rainbow of a bubble you've ever seen. Put your life on hold. Get lost in spheres of joy as you run with the wand, a train of bubbles trailing you. Forget about whatever it was. Just bring it. Bring the wand to your lips and blow the biggest motherload of a rainbow of a bubble you've ever seen before. And then, i dare you to show it off. Blowing bubbles eh? What is the point? Try it. You'll figure it out.

Currently listening : Thank You By Dido Release date: 05 June, 2001

here's war

Current mood: determined

so. you defeated me. i was not defeated. i surrendered all you offered. i turned in retreat. all i ever felt of you has fallen, crashing in confusion. after all you ever felt of me rose, loud and clear. what i ever felt for you, now you will never know. all that you felt for me, caused me to turn, leave, retreat, and go. a blow to the stomach, an arm around my neck, caused by everything you said. and i stayed, to fight. to keep the confusion from falling through. but when it became clear, i could not hold it up anymore. a blow and a choke once more. but i was covered in the mess. i was tangled in what i could not understand, it was a net. did you win? maybe you won. did you defeat me? remember how it started. you and me. what i felt for you, you still dont know. even after the war. so how could the fight have been fair? you still dont know. so it wasn't. and so you did not win. underneath the mess, lost in the tangles. i could not, i didn't want to breathe. i wanted to lose. but that wouldn't be fair. and i am. i am fair. so i surrendered to what you said, what all the blows and the chokes and i surrendered. and i threw the tangles. i left the mess. i retreated back to where i was. way back. way before. the mess is still there. the tangles of confusion. but i dont want to breath. not there. thats where i want to leave. and so i have. the mess is still there. i never cleaned it up. i retreated. i surrendered. i was not defeated.

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Currently listening : Fighter By Christina Aguilera Release date: 03 June, 2003